10 Ways In Which the Sun Could (and Will) Troll Human Civilization

The sun is a pretty big deal, guys. We all love that huge ball of fire in the sky. In fact, its intense heat and energy are so essential for life that some people actually worship it as a god! Weirdos. But I suppose they have a point. It’s safe to say that laying out on the beach on some tropical island just wouldn’t be the same if we lived in perpetual, cold darkness.

On the other hand, things aren’t all literally sunshine. There are plenty of scientists out there that fear the sun and the havoc that she (yes, she!) can wreak. Here’s a look at 10 ways in which the sun could basically screw us.

1. Making Interplanetary Travel Nearly Impossible
Folks, someday we’re going to have to find other planets to colonize if we want to keep human civilization going. Unfortunately, the sun is going to make that as difficult as possible through its radiation. While the Earth’s magnetosphere protects us from the sun’s deadliest radiation, we’re pretty much on our own once we leave the planet. As a result, humans will find it difficult to travel in space for extended periods of time. Unless we develop the technology to create spacesuits made out of magnetosphere, I guess.

2. Evaporating Our Water Supply
Although this article is intended to paint the sun as a bad guy, the truth is that it is currently classified as a main sequence star, the period of its life when it is stable and even kind-hearted. However, in a billion years (the year 1,000,002,018 to be precise) it will have grown by 10%, making the Earth so hot that our oceans will begin evaporate. Granted, most of us won’t be around by then. But I feel bad for those of you who will.

3. Coronal Mass Ejections
Although this sounds more like a medical condition, it is actually a solar explosion in which a cloud of plasma hurls in any given direction at millions of miles an hour. Although it is unlikely to destroy Earth (yay!) any eruption headed our way would have the potential to massively disrupt our electrical systems and plunge us into the Dark Ages. That would be a serious adjustment for everybody. Except the Amish, I guess.

4. Boiling Our Water Supply
Remember how in #9 we talked about how the sun will evaporate our water supply? Those were good times. It turns out that things will actually get even worse. As more and more water evaporates, it will get trapped in our atmosphere, creating a greenhouse gas effect that will heat our planet to the point where the water will start boiling away. Eventually all the bodies of water will be gone, forcing us to take showers using liquid alternatives such as milk and apple juice. Or even pure liquid soap.